Waiting for Tomorrow
by Permanent Rose
Summary: /A new beginning wasn't what she wanted. She just wanted a second chance./ Terri centric


The end of summer brought rain, and Terri found herself sniffling in her dank apartment, a mug of hot tea pressed against her upper lip as she tried in vain to soothe her allergies.

She had not particularly wanted to move to Florida, but with an opportunity at her finger tips in a place so much brighter and more promising than the stale memories she had left in Lima, she dared to hope.

But Florida was not the paradise captured in postcard images. The air conditioning in her small apartment functioned less than half of the time, and her neighbors were either irritable old men or tight knit Hispanic families, leaving Terri to fend on her own.

Her employees were just as incompetent (if not more) than Howard Bamboo, and less than ten percent of them spoke English. She found herself wishing she had payed more attention to Will's once useless Spanish ramblings and hours of monotone recordings played over dinner.

She came home in tears most evenings, collapsing on a bed that was never as comfortable as the one she had shared with Will. Her tears would sting her throat, rubbed raw from futile screeching.

The rain continued to fall in heavy sheets, and as Terri continued to sip her tea in the safety of her apartment, she wondered what it felt like to drown.

XXXX

"Mmmm, yes, that feels...oh! Oh!" Terri moaned, lifting her neck to give him better access. His hand had wandered to her thigh as her own hands moved to tangle through his curly hair.

She heard him chuckle slightly, enjoying her groans. He lowered her down to the couch, hovering over her, his alcohol stained breath reverberating off her face. Terri latched her legs around his thigh, pumping rhythmically, begging for a release.

"You're turning me on so much right now, babe," he practically growled, fumbling with the button of her jeans.

She gasped as his finger rubbed her wet center through the thin material of her panties, her mind lost in a mist of pleasure. He began to wriggle her jeans off her hips, his hands searing against her flushed body, when sucked in a heavy breath, suddenly swatting him away.

"I-I can't do this," she stuttered, zippering up her pants.

"Babe, I-"

"No, please. I think I'm going to be sick." She rose from the couch, supporting herself in the doorway, looking at him with a wild, pleading expression. "Please leave."

She choked out a sigh as the door clicked behind him, frustrated yet relieved as she curled back on the couch, desiring only one set of arms around her to comfort her.

XXXX

The heat simmered on the black asphalt, rising around Terri as she paged through her stack of mail, smiling when she noticed a letter from Howard. Though his penmanship was worse than a first graders, his letters reminded her that perhaps she was not as alone as she felt.

XXXX

"Kyle, I swear if you break that lamp, God help me!" Kendra shrieked, eyeing one of her triplets as he jumped up onto the coffee table. "God, Terr, it's so damn hot here. I don't know how you survive," Kendra whined, picking up a forgotten magazine for the table, lazily fanning herself.

"You get used to it," Terri shrugged, the thick humidity not so stifling any longer.

"I suppose I should put the little demons to bed soon," Kendra sighed, glancing over at the microwave clock. "You said you have an air mattress?"

Terri nodded. "But it's only a double." Terri looked at the three growing boys skeptically.

Kendra scoffed. "Hell, they could fit on a twin for all I care."

It took over an hour to wrestle the boys into their pajamas, and half an hour more before Kendra managed to settle them all on the air mattress. She joined Terri in her bedroom, the heavy scent of make up remover and facial creams filling the small space as Kendra readied herself from bed.

With her face bare and wearing only an old t-shirt, Terri was reminded of a younger Kendra, offering Terri just as questionable advice in late night whispers as she did now.

"Ready for bed?" Terri yawned, exhausted from merely spending one afternoon with her rowdy nephews.

Kendra matched her yawn, nodding as she crawled into bed, immediately kicking off the covers. "Fuck, it is so hot," she whined, letting loose the more colorful profanities she reined in while with her boys.

Terri was silent, taking comfort in the damp humidity that settled in the room.

"You doing okay, Terr?" Kendra asked, offering her first real sign of concern.

"As well as I can be," Terri muttered in reply, watching her sister frown in the darkness.

"Hey, except for the lack of cool air, you seem to be doing pretty well for yourself," Kendra told her, reaching out to take Terri's hand in her own as she continued. "You know, Terri, there's nothing more I could ask for in the world than Phil and my boys, but there are those days I dare to wonder what my life would be like if I weren't tied down by all of that. I know you've lost a lot, Terri, but damn, girl, you've got the entire world at your finger tips-you have the chance to just start you life over."

Terri squeezed Kendra's hand, unable to find the words to explain to her sister that a new beginning wasn't what she wanted. She just wanted a second chance.

"We'd better get some sleep," Kendra spoke when Terri did not. "I've learned to thank God for every minute those boys are quiet."

Terri smiled, her head sinking into her pillow as her eyes fluttered shut.

XXXX

She laughed at first when she first saw the Christmas lights wound around the palm trees in people's front lawns, but she soon found them comforting as she drove home from work, her window rolled down slightly to catch the breeze.

She imagined having her own sturdy palm to decorate once she could afford her own home, and as her mind dared to imagine how she would decorate the interior, she wondered when she had begun to think of Florida as home.

The lyrics to "Baby, It's Cold Outside" drifted from one of the open apartment windows as Terri stepped into the warm December night, the familiar melody mixing with the even more familiar hum of cicadas. She felt a dull pang in her heart as she recalled how Will had belted the song on chilly winters mornings, beckoning her to join him in the shower.

It was easy enough to brush away the nostalgia; after all, it wasn't the first Christmas she had spent without him.

She turned on her own radio upon entering the apartment, humming absentmindedly as she flipped through her mail. A few bills, a second Christmas card from Howard because he hadn't been sure if the first one sent, a dental appointment reminder.

Her breath caught as her eyes fell on the last envelope in the stack, the familiar scrawl causing her heart to jump. She couldn't open it for a moment, feeling bitter that he had chosen now to contact her, just after she had stopped seeing him in every curly haired man and dimpled smile.

Her fingers shook as she pried open the envelope, opening the card to reveal a simple message:

Dear Terri,

I hope it's okay that I got your address from Howard. I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas.

Will.

She read it three times before she finally smiled, placing it back securely in the envelope, daring to hope for the first since she had moved here.

Though a thousand miles away, he was thinking of her, too. 


End file.
